INTJ

I got interested with personality tests again. I have always been interested with these sort of tests as I will like to get to know myself better. Anyway, I did a test which was similar to the Briggs Meyer test and the result was INTJ. I obtained this result a few times before but I felt doubtful as I got a different result before that too (yes I did a few times). I read the functions and it started to make sense to me. Some of the negative characters that INTJ's have eg arrogance do not match my character. I might have those when I was younger but I am not sure whether that makes me an INTJ or not. So if I really am an INTJ, I have to say that I am glad to be one. INTJs aren't suppose to be affected by conflicts and criticisms. For me, I do not feel anything initially when I am lectured, for example. So the negative feelings must have been self-inflicted as I think too much after that. Also, the mindset of not wanting to get married from such a young age might be because of my personality type. Apparently, INTJs are people who have very high expectations when it comes to this aspect. I am not really sure but I think INTJs can be rather oblivious because of their quaternary function, ie extra sensing, which is their Archilles heel. INTJs are really rare people, they make up about 1% of mankind in this world. The fact that the people who belong to this personality type is so rare and online tests aren't really accurate, I have to say that I am still feeling doubtful about the result; however I am more postive than before that I am an INTJ after reading the functions of the personality type after that. Actually, I was supposed to be studying instead of researching about all these stuff. Oh wells.

Smartass

Ee Lyn once told me that we should write down happy things rather than writing down sad moments as writing something down makes us feel that particular emotion longer. But the truth is, when I feel sad only do I have the need to spill out my emotions, not when I am happy. So here we go... Being called stupid in your face kinda hurts your ego you know. Well if it is my boss who calls me so in the future, I will bear with it whether I like it or not. But if it's a family member, obviously you will give out reasons and argue back. As my reason does not stand strong, I am referred to as having an attitude problem, argue for the sake of arguing and goodness knows what else are they thinking in the back of their minds. This is quite a small matter considering if we want to compare to the huge family rows which happen to other families. Well the truth is, I must just avoid the whole situation from happening by not saying anything at all at the wrong time. So what if I am being called stupid? I'm not letting what you say run my life anyway. Come to think of it, everyone in this world has attitude problems as none of us are perfect. All we can do is to fix our flaws, and I am doing that right now. So yeah, I shall try to be more diplomatic even though I am angry. This is my side of the story for tonight.

CNY

Personally, I find CNY rather boring. I used to love this event as we would be celebrating my great grandfather's birthday in the restaurant, ie we will get to eat lots of delicious food. Of course, there were angpau too. Now, nothing about CNY is appealing except the holidays itself and that I have the opportunity to travel. In the future days to come, I will celebrate CNY with my family for the first few days and ciao I go to some other place. Somehow when I thought about travelling overseas in the future, I picture myself travelling alone carrying a backpack walking between some ancient buildings in black and white. Whether I will have the chance to travel to such places in such fashion or not, I will soon find out.

Disappointment

I am quite a disappointment eh? Did some things that were wrong but I don't really feel guilty about it. All the same, I will change my lazy ways and be a better daughter. Finally did I know the truth of what they were thinking about me all these while. Do they think that I am so because I am an open book and rather predictable? Cuz some other people who they think are rather innocent are actually worse than me. All the same, it is good to know what people actually think about me in the back of their minds. I know, I have not much achievements in my life. In fact, the only thing about me which I can be proud of is my studies. Not that they think rather highly regarding that. I feel that the only way I can prove my worth to myself is through studying hard and doing well in my studies, as I have no other achievements to shout about. Overall, no matter what they said about being proud of me the other time, I will know at the same time, how lowly they think about me.